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Rage Quit – Virtua Tennis 3 | Rooster Teeth


*Achievement Hunter and Rage Quit intro* We gonna do men or women? We gonna do dicks? We got dicks and balls and we got titties and va jay jay’s. We’re going dicks. All right, Pecker, we’re gonna toughen you up. We’re gonna give you a whole new look. We’re gonna give you a new head, give you new hair, you’re gonna be FUCKING badass! We have a height of 205 cm and a weight of 50 kg. Roughly translated, I believe that’s somewhere around 7’12 and 74 pounds. You wanna make sure that you can WRAP your hand completely around your tennis player’s ankle. If you cannot, they’re too fat. Looking fucking fresh to death. Give him a sweet pink rod. Not exactly sure how the customs work in tennis, but if it’s anything like earrings I’m gonna- this guy definitely is gonna wanna wear a wrist band on his RIGHT HAND ONLY… fellas. Something’s tellin’ me this guy has way more than four different forms of service, if you know what I mean. SEXUAL FAVORS! Return posture, other wise known as “The Art of the Dump”. We’ll call this one, “The Loosey Goosey”. Shit just falls on out. This would be “The Nerd Fiddling His Willy While Waiting For the Urinal”. You can see he’s got some sweet double-handed techniques going on there between his legs. That’s professional shit. We just call this one “The Invitation”. There’s nothing else you need to know. I like this posture! I think this the one we’re going with! This is “The Dump On the Go”. You gotta drop a turd and keep on moving, just fucking shit and run baby! Shit and run! This is not a stroke form. I will show you stroke form. *orgy voice* Oh, I’m jerking off the corner. Oh, I’m jerking off. Oh, you like that internet? Oh, I’m jerking off the corner. *normal voice* I think Pecker said, “We’re ready to go.” Oh yay, fucking sweet I got an achievement! Now this game is on my gamer card forever. Wow, just kill me right now. Awesome. What is this shit? I picked “World Tour”, just let me hit the fucking ball with the racket! I just wanna whack the ball! Why-why is there an “Alien Attack” in fucking Virtua Tennis 3? Who the-who the fuck does that?! Who the fuck says, “You know what I wanna do today? I wanna go out and fucking kill some aliens! I’m gonna DEFEND the EARTH from INVADERS! I’m gonna buy Virtua Tennis 3.” Bowling?! This the bowling sim now?! Goddamn it! I don’t know where the game is. I guess it’s at the Tennis Academy. That seems like the most likely place to hit a goddamn tennis ball, but I don’t know, let’s fucking find out. I just wanna fucking- I wanna fight a guy. So, terrible accident, turns out Pecker’s dead. Here we are at “Exhibition”, and we’re just gonna fucking pick a real tennis player and go. NEVER MIND, here’s Pecker hiding in the old custom character slot! Get in here, Pecker! Pecker versus Andy Roddick, that’s a LITTLE lop sided, but Andy Roddick’s just gonna have to deal with the disadvantage. Dude, does it fucking matter? Really? Is any of this gonna change anything? Yeah, let’s play in Germany. Why the fuck not? We’ll play foosball with Stalin again. I don’t even know how to set how many ga- how does tennis work?! What is a match? What is a game? Does the game win the match? Is there a front? What’s the front- Is this like the front nine or on the back nine now? HOW MANY NINE’S ARE THERE?! Oh, I have beaten height and weight! See Andy Roddick? TERRIBLE condition to be playing tennis. Height? 187 cm? That’s actually like 4’3. The guy’s WAY TOO SMALL. He won’t even be able to hit the ball! It’s gonna go right over his fucking head, stupid jerk! Come on, Pecker, stretch them calf muscles. Gotta work that shit out before we beat the shit out of Andy Roddick! All right, I’m gonna hit the ball. Look at that! Fucking beautiful! Fuck. 15?! He only scored one time! Loo- Oh my God, he can… well, what the fuck? *German language* What? Fuck you. Did he win the whole set already?! NO, ANDY!!! I wasn’t ready yet! *Constipation noise* Oh, you suck, dude! Oh fuck, he scored? Nevermind. Come on, baby. Oh, that was bullshit! I had something in my eye! There was dust in my eye! Pretty sure MOST tennis matches last about a minute and forty-three seconds, but we’ll run it again just in case that was a little over regulation. We’ll try to keep this one shorter. Time to bring the ruckus, no more fucking around Roddick. You-you fucking- You ro-you rod. You stupid lightning rod. That was pure power. That was pure power. (2x) Fucking GODDAMN IT! COME ON, PECKER!!! SPIKE IT! SPIKE IT! (2x) There we go! There we go! (2x) And you fucking hit it out of bounds. YOU FUCKING STUPID RED BANDANNA WEARING SHIT!! Oh my God! WHAT ARE YOU HITTING OVER THERE?! YOU’RE HITTING THE CAMERA GUY!! You fucking piece of shit! I’M GONNA FUCK YOUR WIFE!! Goddamn it! GODDAMN IT!! (2x) Great, I got an achievement. “Get your fucking ass kicked by Andy Roddick.” But that’s fine, BECAUSE I’M GONNA GO FUCK HIS WIFE! *Achievement Hunter outro*

David Frank

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100 COMMENTS

  1. Roks94 Posted on April 8, 2014 at 12:12 pm

    OMG I remember playing this game as a kid. The worst game evar!!!!! xD

    Reply
  2. K Clark Posted on April 11, 2014 at 9:50 pm

    I like "the invitation".

    Reply
  3. Armando Hedgepath Posted on April 17, 2014 at 10:39 pm

    Hair lolololo

    Reply
  4. PachaKay Posted on April 22, 2014 at 1:35 am

    I literally couldn't breathe lol

    Reply
  5. Dejah Turner Posted on May 9, 2014 at 9:13 pm

    LMAO at the stroke form. 

    Reply
  6. popasoda1900 Posted on May 13, 2014 at 3:51 am

    best rage quit ever ZXDD OMG DUDE I CANT BREATHE

    Reply
  7. ゴゴゴゴゴゴ Posted on May 14, 2014 at 2:37 am

    Jerking off in corner

    Reply
  8. Todd Dompf Posted on May 15, 2014 at 5:11 am

    crap, i can fit my hand around my ankles

    Reply
  9. Chackbro1 Posted on May 20, 2014 at 10:08 am

    Somebody knows nothing about tennis

    Reply
  10. Princess Peach Posted on May 24, 2014 at 2:41 am

    I have to stop the video every few seconds because I laugh so hard it starts to hurt and I need a break!

    Reply
  11. Six Gun Shauna Posted on June 9, 2014 at 11:25 pm

    2:20 If you know what I mean…

    Reply
  12. Duncan Galvez Posted on June 11, 2014 at 2:25 am

    the video is 4:20 mins long

    Reply
  13. moniemaker27 Posted on June 17, 2014 at 6:58 pm

    Just Blaze.

    Reply
  14. Autumn Akumu Posted on June 19, 2014 at 8:15 am

    So in the video Michael's like "So I think that's like 7 foot 12…?" And I'm here like "Michael, that's 8 feet tall.."

    Reply
  15. Victoria Querido Posted on June 23, 2014 at 1:12 am

    WAIT

    pecker's 7,12
    and 74 pounds…..and he lost
    WOW

    Reply
  16. WarMachine MI Posted on June 28, 2014 at 7:06 pm

    1:22 LMAO

    Reply
  17. Vette Latrioux Posted on August 22, 2014 at 1:00 am

    He's guy was actually 6,7 and he weighted about 110 lbs

    Reply
  18. Savage Finish Posted on August 31, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    funniest shit ever i cant breathe

    Reply
  19. rockingalzlol Posted on September 4, 2014 at 1:09 am

    Haha so funny

    Reply
  20. MrDramm Posted on September 23, 2014 at 10:55 pm

    this guy is fucking hilarious the 'sweet double handed action' comment made me snort my drink 😀

    Reply
  21. Michael Angelo Posted on October 18, 2014 at 6:33 pm

    NEW SUB GG XD

    Reply
  22. Nodog799 Posted on October 25, 2014 at 6:11 pm

    6 foot seven inches and 110 pounds

    Reply
  23. thedoctorand Posted on November 4, 2014 at 6:35 pm

    3:04 Lee Evans already made that joke.

    Reply
  24. Tokisaki Kurumi Posted on November 25, 2014 at 10:50 am

    "because i am gonna fxxx his wife!!!" rofl

    Reply
  25. Shibbles Posted on November 28, 2014 at 2:58 am

    I play tennis 😀

    Reply
  26. BDeLuca4444 Posted on November 28, 2014 at 5:39 am

    Good Luck finding Brooklyn Decker

    Reply
  27. Agrellar Posted on December 24, 2014 at 6:31 pm

    2:17 
    Pecker: Give me that ass Roddick!

    Reply
  28. Amlink Posted on January 19, 2015 at 6:12 am

    lost it  at the stroke form XD

    Reply
  29. GoLonga2 Posted on January 20, 2015 at 2:33 am

    3:23 I love how when he said, "Oh that was bullshit, I had something in my eye.", Andy Roddick wiped his eye with his arm.

    Reply
  30. Sir Chris Posted on January 21, 2015 at 1:00 pm

    achievment unlocked

    Reply
  31. Pierce Adams Posted on January 30, 2015 at 9:37 am

    Michael is the John McEnroe of Video games. 

    Reply
  32. MykeTheArtista Posted on February 27, 2015 at 3:40 am

    I can't tell if this is the funniest Rage Quit he's made or if it's something else

    Reply
  33. Blackrose Revan Posted on March 6, 2015 at 4:53 pm

    "This one is called the invitation. There's nothing else you need to know."

    Reply
  34. candymountainn Posted on March 13, 2015 at 5:34 am

    This had me falling out of my chair when I first saw it…jeez almost 3 years ago, and it still makes me laugh. Thank you 🙂

    Reply
  35. dizee271 Posted on March 31, 2015 at 2:54 am

    So tragic accident, Pecker's dead….one of the best Rage Quits ever. right up there with surgeon sim

    Reply
  36. Robby Posted on April 23, 2015 at 2:10 pm

    what ever happened to top spin? that game was super fun

    Reply
  37. ThatOneShyguy Posted on May 21, 2015 at 4:52 pm

    SEXUAL FAVORS

    Reply
  38. Vampire Queen Aly Posted on June 6, 2015 at 4:17 pm

    First rule of tennis:

    Do not play tennis.

    Reply
  39. King Stoner Posted on August 15, 2015 at 9:21 pm

    205 cm is 6 feet, 7 inches

    Reply
  40. Adam Block Posted on September 21, 2015 at 11:37 am

    Andy Roddick's wife is very sexy xD

    Reply
  41. Dalton G Posted on September 28, 2015 at 12:56 am

    With my custom player, I can beat up on Andy Roddick

    Reply
  42. Dominic Ciaramitaro Posted on October 2, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    Im dying😂😂😂

    Reply
  43. Connor Mullen Posted on October 29, 2015 at 1:44 am

    One of my favorite rage quits

    Reply
  44. JazzMan Posted on November 11, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    His unit conversions are epic.

    Reply
  45. d a v i d o Posted on December 2, 2015 at 8:36 pm

    This is what introduced me to Roosterteeth and Achievement Hunter

    Reply
  46. Andrew Sav Posted on December 4, 2015 at 9:10 pm

    This was the first Rage Quit I watched and still my all time favorite.

    Reply
  47. yoongi's lawyer Posted on December 21, 2015 at 3:01 am

    if you change the video speed to 0.5 it sounds like Michael's drunk

    Reply
  48. Ms. Whatchamacallit. Posted on December 23, 2015 at 5:20 pm

    No! ANDY!!

    Reply
  49. JeffSan Posted on December 29, 2015 at 9:57 pm

    lol i remember playing this game long ago

    Reply
  50. King Kickass Posted on January 7, 2016 at 4:12 am

    I hope Andy Roddick watched this.

    Reply
  51. No. Posted on January 30, 2016 at 1:37 am

    0:29 it's 110 pounds and 6'9 i think.

    Reply
  52. MartialKaiju98 Posted on January 30, 2016 at 9:55 pm

    1:30 That's where Lazer Team comes in! LOL XD

    Reply
  53. Jeremiah Sherman Posted on February 12, 2016 at 2:48 am

    Doesnt Andy Roddick Have a really Hot Wife ??

    Reply
  54. bmoreravens12 Posted on February 18, 2016 at 8:44 am

    Reminds me of Cr1tikal

    Reply
  55. 3taoren Posted on March 1, 2016 at 7:09 am

    I love the fact he insults his own character that he created lol

    Reply
  56. Matt Garber Posted on March 17, 2016 at 10:16 pm

    WE CALL THIS ONE THE INVITATION. BRILLIANT

    Reply
  57. Yan Naing Posted on April 13, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    3:09 I'm dying 😀 LOL

    Reply
  58. Raven Shirwood Posted on April 30, 2016 at 1:06 am

    "Vertua Tennis."
    Me: … Something doesn't look right. Reads again
    "Vertua Tennis."
    "VERTUA Tennis"
    Me: GOD DAMMIT

    Reply
  59. Livvy Hackett Posted on June 27, 2016 at 2:07 pm

    Omg, I remember playing this game xD

    Reply
  60. ꜱᴛᴇᴀᴍɪɴ' ʜᴏᴛ ɢᴀʀʙᴀɢᴇ Posted on June 29, 2016 at 6:31 pm

    I turned on the captions at 4:08 and

    "But that's fine, because America is white!"

    Reply
  61. Oshea Kami Posted on August 22, 2016 at 2:17 pm

    Why didn't Michael voice GTAV Michael? It makes perfect sense!

    Reply
  62. Markilo the Filipino Posted on September 16, 2016 at 3:41 pm

    I've always been curious… How was Andy Roddick's wife???

    Reply
  63. Brandon J. Posted on November 14, 2016 at 1:54 pm

    It's actually about 6'9" and 110 lbs

    Reply
  64. EdwardMaximus Posted on November 24, 2016 at 12:43 pm

    His reaction to the achievement lol!

    Reply
  65. Blueboy0 Posted on December 16, 2016 at 10:52 am

    The last minute of this video is absolute gold.

    Reply
  66. Ben Sell Posted on February 2, 2017 at 9:16 am

    I've been watching this for years and just got the right hand only joke

    Reply
  67. Payers Forthewin Posted on February 14, 2017 at 3:49 pm

    wait for it…. u suck

    Reply
  68. Alex Kinningham Posted on March 5, 2017 at 6:30 pm

    My all-time favorite Rage Quit.

    Reply
  69. Lawson Leong Posted on March 19, 2017 at 7:25 pm

    I don't know if Michael actually didn't know the rules to tennis or if he was pretending but either way it's pretty funny.

    Reply
  70. Michael Lopez Posted on April 19, 2017 at 10:19 pm

    187 is 6 foot dumbass

    Reply
  71. Ian Nations Posted on April 30, 2017 at 3:01 am

    "15? he only scored one time!"

    that's how tennis works…

    Reply
  72. biscuit Posted on June 8, 2017 at 11:42 am

    S E X U A L F A V O R S

    Reply
  73. Denys Crepcea Posted on June 11, 2017 at 8:21 pm

    i facking idit

    Reply
  74. Lorenzo Tralfaz Posted on June 18, 2017 at 1:39 pm

    205 cm=7'12"
    187 cm=4'3"

    Reply
  75. Samantha Young Posted on July 21, 2017 at 6:01 pm

    "15?! He only scored one time!!" Me the first time I played tennis

    Reply
  76. Anhel Rajikova Posted on August 14, 2017 at 10:49 pm

    Was that pose a reference to Ray in Minecraft?

    Reply
  77. Anhel Rajikova Posted on August 14, 2017 at 10:50 pm

    I don't think it's possible to have those measurements while alive

    Reply
  78. QueenTaipan17 Posted on October 2, 2017 at 4:59 am

    Still watching these videos in 2017.

    Reply
  79. Josh Ayala Posted on October 5, 2017 at 8:29 pm

    is michael a virgin

    Reply
  80. Jack Boyko Posted on October 27, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    You are the best YouTuber ever

    Reply
  81. Christian Klinker Posted on December 13, 2017 at 10:32 pm

    2x speed 👌

    Reply
  82. Michael Bender Posted on December 25, 2017 at 5:00 am

    This got me crying😂💀my stomach hurts

    Reply
  83. Coultes0423 Posted on March 6, 2018 at 3:19 pm

    I legit thought he was going to quit before he even played a match.

    Reply
  84. Necrotoyip Posted on May 2, 2018 at 1:02 am

    well that escalated quickly 3:40

    Reply
  85. Gage Posted on July 10, 2018 at 5:42 am

    Isint seven foot twelve just eight foot

    Reply
  86. Cathy G Posted on August 21, 2018 at 2:22 am

    "15?! He only scored one time!!" and "Pretty sure most tennis matches last about a minute and 43 seconds, but we'll run it again just in case that was a little over regulation."

    Reply
  87. NotoriousJASS Posted on September 6, 2018 at 1:58 pm

    loved this game lol

    Reply
  88. NotoriousJASS Posted on September 6, 2018 at 1:59 pm

    187 is more 6'1 than 4'9 but hey you're not the smartest tool in the shed anyway lmao

    Reply
  89. The Scream Source Posted on September 29, 2018 at 8:20 am

    The funniest I think I've ever seen!

    Reply
  90. Vaas Montenegro Posted on February 18, 2019 at 12:48 am

    To be fair, Andy Roddick's wife is hot. I wouldn't mind doing it too…

    Reply
  91. Breanne Venn Posted on March 16, 2019 at 11:18 pm

    Half the video is Michael not even playing, boring

    Reply
  92. V1 Moto Posted on March 22, 2019 at 3:56 am

    Want more Rage quit episodes please

    Reply
  93. Jared Posted on April 18, 2019 at 8:31 am

    I think you're supposed to play the campaign to give you character better stats.

    Reply
  94. kyro rogers Posted on August 10, 2019 at 10:22 pm

    Rwby volume 7 is my fan video for you.

    Reply
  95. Jake Rodriguez Posted on October 9, 2019 at 4:18 am

    Why does he remind me of when stewie griffin raged at tennis

    Reply
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